Columbiana Review


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Jordan Dunn, Senior Arts and Entertainment Reviews Writer

Hey movie fans!

If you still haven’t seen the movie Colombiana, then take my word for it; You’re not missing much. With choppy action scenes, slow family parts, and its confusing romance subplot; this films overall ‘C’ rating was just.
The movie starts off promising, with 10 year old Cataleya (Amandla Stenberg) making her escape from the thugs that killed her parents. With bullets flying all around her, Cataleya jumps off a building, runs through narrow alleys, and slides into sewers to make it to the American embassy. There she trades her father’s work on the thugs’ drug lord boss, for a passport to America.
But unfortunately, the movie takes a turn for the worse and loses its touch. After 15 years of training from her uncle, Cataleya (now played by Zoe Saldana) goes on a killing spree of vengeance after her parents’ killers and their boss. This movie had a Kill Bill type of feeling to it. Both movies involved hot, trained assassin chicks in skin tight clothes going after a group of people that kill their family and made their lives horrible; both main characters are never satisfied until they’re all dead and gone. Another thing Kill Bill and Colombiana had in common was that they both had short action scenes and choppy confusing plots.
When the movie was finally over, I got the chance to interview Jim, the manger of the AMC Lowes movie theater in Lexington Park. Now, you may not know this, but one of the manger’s many duties is that he has to watch every movie that comes in to make sure they aren’t damaged in any way, before they are released for the public. He told me, “Yeah, in fact I have to watch them all. You know, to make sure they don’t have anything wrong with them…yes. I even have to watch the chick flicks!” he laughed. To my surprise, he didn’t have anything negative to say about Colombiana.
I started off by asking him if he knew anything about the actress’ career before this movie. He told me he knew that Zoe Saldana was also in the movies Avatar, Star Trek, and Pirates of the Caribbean: The Curse of the Black Pearl. And before that, he told me she was a model. Next I asked what his favorite part was. Like my own opinion, he thought the beginning chase scene was the best. To end my interview, I ask him one last question. If he could, what part of the movie would he change? I thought this would be a hard question to answer, since I wanted to change half the movie. But what do you know, his answer was nothing. Nothing!
In holistic review, after seeing this movie, interviewing the manger, and researching the director and lead actress, I’d have to give Colombiana a ‘C+’ in review. Until next time, movie fans, this is Jordan Dunn signing off.